On the teachings and imitations of
Saint Hung Mung
Setting Orange Chaos 5, 3169 Anno Lumina
On Setting Orange Chaos 5 (January 5th), Discordians set aside the day to remember and commune with Saint Hung Mung, whose name means Primal Chaos, sage of Ancient China, inventor of the Sacred Chao, Official Missionary to the Heathens, leader of Operation Mindfuck and patron of the season of Chaos.
This is the season of Chaos, the ancient universe as earliest humans saw it, where anything and everything is REAL. Apostle Hung Mung came out of this mindset and planted the seeds of the Taoist religion, whose followers don't apply their force to the universe, but instead allow the universe to guide their force.
Hung Mung appears in the writings of old Chaung Tzu, where he responds to the inquiries of Great Knowledge by by laughing and slapping his knee and shouting, "I don't know! I don't know!"
Great Knowledge was traveling east, carried along upon the wings of a whirlwind. Suddenly he met Hung Mung, who was jumping around, slapping his thighs and hopping like a bird. Great Knowledge saw this and stopped dead, standing still in respect, and said, 'Elderly man, who are you? What are you doing?'
Hung Mung continued to slap his thighs and hop like a bird, then replied, 'Enjoying myself!
Great Knowledge said, 'I would like to ask a question.'
Hung Mung looked at Great Knowledge and said, 'That's a shame!'
Great Knowledge said, 'The very breath of Heaven is no longer in harmony. Earth's very breath is ensnared, the six breaths do not mix, the four seasons do not follow each other. Now I want to combine the six breaths in order to bring life to all things. How do I do this?'
Hung Mung slapped his thighs, hopped around and said, 'I don't know, I don't know!'
Great Knowledge could go no further with his questioning. But three years later, traveling east, he passed the wilderness of Sung and came upon Hung Mung again. Great Knowledge, very pleased, rushed towards him, stood before him and said, 'Heaven, have you forgotten me? Heaven, have you forgotten me?' Bowing his head twice, he asked for teaching from Hung Mung.
Hung Mung said, 'Wandering everywhere, without a clue why. Wildly impulsive, without a clue where. I wander around in this odd fashion, I see that nothing comes without reason. What can I know?'
Great Knowledge replied, 'I also seem carried on by an aimless influence, and yet the people follow me wherever I go. I cannot help their doing so. But now as they thus imitate me, I wish to hear a word from you.'
Hung Mung said, 'Ah! your mind needs to be nourished. Do you only take the position of doing nothing, and things will of themselves become transformed. Neglect your body; cast out from you your power of hearing and sight; forget what you have in common with things; cultivate a grand similarity with the chaos of the plastic ether; unloose your mind; set your spirit free; be still as if you had no soul. Of all the multitude of things every one returns to its root. Every one returns to its root, and does not know that it is doing so. They all are as in the state of chaos, and during all their existence they do not leave it. They do not ask its name; they do not seek to spy out their nature; and thus it is that things come to life of themselves.'
Not claiming to know anything, Primal Chaos reveals everything to informed curiosity - though not usually in a very orderly format. In becoming acquainted with this sage who knows nothing and does not care that he does not know anything, we can learn enough to accomplish nearly anything.
St. Mung and the Discordians
I confess that there is nothing to teach: no religion, no science, no body of information which will lead your mind back to reality. Today I speak in this fashion, tomorrow in another, but always the Way is beyond words and beyond mind. Simply be aware of the oneness of things.
--the Apostle Hung Mung
The Discordian Calendar is dated from the year of the Illumination of Hung Mung. Cabbages are the sworn enemies of the Discordians because of Hung Mung. Long ago, in the season of Chaos, the Apostle Hung Mung met a Cabbage passing along the road to Timbuktu. The Cabbage said some very rude things about Hung Mung's mother. Hung Mung became very angry at the Cabbage, and said some very rude things right back. From these humble beginnings was the eternal enmity between Discordians and Cabbages born.
Discordians also say you can get a look at Hung Mung by getting stoned and tuning your television to a channel that is not broadcasting. His dancing image will become more and more visible the harder you look for it. And having no sponsors, Hung Mung - they say - is never interrupted by commercials. Zenarchists are skeptical of that much.
Hung Mung's element is Orange, and he is often willing to intercede in situations where a dearth of Orange is causing discomfort (such as waiting in line at the DMV or the realization that one is growing old and fat), but he will generally spend more time grousing than helping in any productive way.
By inventing the Sacred Chao and promptly getting ripped off by the Taoists, Hung Mung inadvertently started the fine Discordian tradition of ripping others off intellectually wherever possible. The whole Principia Discordia itself is Kopyrighted "All Rights Reversed", as is this page, as are most Discordian writings. This is because we believe that a truly Good Idea lives a life of its own, and doggedly claiming it as one's personal property is piggish. Besides, it's also a lot easier to steal crap from other people than to make it up all by yourself.